ok, i know what i wrote. i've had a while to think things through and i decided that this isn't the place for anything that's personal. especailly when it may involve another person's feelings. i have my own personal diary for that stuff. i'm starting a new page here. starting from scratch.

the reason i decided to start this up again is the most amazing thing just happened to me. most people would find this stupid, but it totally made me a happy kid. i just got done rebuilding my 1974 ludwig snare. i know that sounds silly, but you have to understand the history i have with this insturment. i got it by accident when i bought my current drumset. i was supposed to get a shitty pearl stainless steel snare that matched the numbers on my drumset. there was a mix up at the old scanlan and i got this snare instead. i didn't realize it until i got home and was going to take it back until i played it. this drum actually sang. it sounded reminicent of brendan canty from fugazi's snare. i was in absolute heaven. i was in yellow #5 at the time and it was right when we were starting to get a following and this drum helped make our "sound".

eventually, as time went by and i beat relentlessly on this drum, it started to fall apart. parts were very hard to find for it, so i decided to "upgrade" to a new snare. at the time jimmy chamberlin from the smashing pumpkins was using a free floating pearl snare and that's what i decided to go with seeing how he had the best snare sound ever. i ended up throwing my old ludwig in the closet until larry gaggin resurrected it, rebuilt some of it and learned how to play drums. eventually, he couldn't keep up with the upkeep on it and it sat in my basement for years. this christmas josh found a snare a lot like my old ludwig and he bought it for me for x-mas. i stole all the vital parts i needed of it and today i finished it up and what a joy it is to play it again. i plays like butter and sounds almost better than it ever did. it made me super happy to be able to play it again. it gave me inspiration to get going again musically.

i even had a moment of nostalgia with this snare. as i was putting it together, i noticed that i etched my name and "yellow no. 5" into the steel hoop. it made me smile and remember all the places that this snare and i have been together. it was a nice change of pace.